The only team that won last night was the only team with John Hattig. Count the ring!

This, of course, is supposed to be Joe's Game Report. I was at the ball park, doing my STATS gig, taking abuse from Fordin, and just making a few notes.

I got carried away.

In this review article we’ll use win probability to examine the performances of the Blue Jays’ bullpen. Part I looks at Brandon League, Matt Whiteside, Pete Walker and Miguel Batista. Part II will be up on Friday or the weekend and will examine Justin Speier, Jason Frasor, Vinnie Chulk and Scott Schoeneweis.

Dave Bush skips the Jays to go for the sweep in today's early start. And, uh, I've used up all the curling lingo I have.

The thread is now open! The Jays win a bit of an ugly one over KC, 12 to 9.

Who's your game MVP? What was the key play of the game?

Yeah, I have a lot of pictures of Eric Hinske. I don't really know why. (I mean, I like the guy -- but do I like him five times as much as Orlando Hudson?) We have to get through them some time, and so here's another one:

Two blow out wins and one fairly big loss for Josh Banks.

He snatches at you and you match his cigarette
She pulls the eyes out with a face like a magnet
I don't know how much more of this I can take
She's filing her nails while they're dragging the lake

If you're a fan of the World's Strongest Man competition, make sure you note Roy Halladay's starts on your calendar.

Some time last week, Magpie managed to work the "immortal Jean-Luc Picard" into the lede for one of the final official Game Threads. If you don't know -- well, first, shame on you -- Picard is the captain of the starship Enterprise-D from the mid-1980's TV show Star Trek: The Next Generation.

Given that Mags posted that thread on the same day the WB network announced with finality that Enterprise, the current iteration of Star Trek, would not return next season, it got me to thinking ... could we combine the two great geek passions of my life, Baseball's Hall of Names and science fiction (specifically in this case Star Trek) to come up with an All-Trek lineup?

Even though nobody named "Picard" has ever played major leage ball, with FIVE series and something like forty-six movies in the can, we ought to be able to field a pretty, um, stellar (har!) team. Warp factor nine, Mr. Magpie. Engage!

Sometimes you just get lucky. Anybody heading to the Rogers Centre tonight gets to see what might just be a gem of a game: Halladay vs Greinke. Greinke, as Magpie has pointed out to us, suffers from an affliction entirely out of his hands: too few runs in support, or the "He Just Doesn't Know How To Win" syndrome.

We here on the Batter's Box Roster would like to experiment with a post-game analysis and discussion article we'd like to call "Instant Replays." This is your first Instant Replay article, so feel free to define it however you like by posting your thoughtful reactions to tonight's game.

Bryan Smith, formerly of Wait Til Next Year and The Hardball Times, has a fine article on the top college hitters to watch over at his new home, The Baseball Analysts.

You'd think with a headline like that I'd be posting a picture of John McDonald in the field, doing something spectacular.

Nope, here's a picture of him batting:

A 2 and 2 night on the farm, with the 3 Stars brought to you by the letter C.

Josh Towers, meet eight near-shutout innings.

Innings, meet Josh Towers. I like this arrangement.

After having an awfully tough time with the best club in the AL Central thus far, the Jays now welcome the team that's struggling more than any other club in the American League (notwithstanding what you might read in the New York Post).

The 8-23 Royals come into town without a lot of confidence, although they did gut out a victory at Camden Yards yesterday. Will the Jays get well, as they did against Tampa Bay? Or will Kansas City start to turn some of their close losses into wins?

This week's Scout features a lone bright light on offence, a very promising new reliever and a touted young starter who should sue his teammates for non-support.

On to the Advance Scout!