I’m on the hunt I’m after you
Smell like I sound, I’m lost in a crowd

True enough, because with Seattle's 4-1 victory over the Rangers at Safeco last night, the struggling Blue Jays are now the only major-league team that has yet to win a home game this young season. Already the owners of a franchise-worst 0-5 mark to start the year in Toronto, the Blue Jays will try mightily to break that string today. Making that task a little dicier is that Pat Hentgen is starting today, against the Orioles' Eric DuBose. Pat has looked, well, bad, pretty much ever since he donned a Jays uniform back in March. I'm not privy to front-office machinations, but I'm pretty sure that if the Jays' record drops to 3-9 today, I would not want to be within several cubic metres of J.P. Ricciardi.

Take a moment to reflect that they're worse in Montreal.

The Expos have won just two games, dropped their last six and can't score runs. In six games in hitting friendly Hiram Bithorn stadium they managed just four, since then they have five in their last two games, but have conceded ten to the Phillies.

Yesterday it was a 2 run ninth for the Orioles that handed the Jays a 5-3 loss. The first run came on Justin Speier's first pitch in the 9th that Larry Bigbie hit out of the park.

Batter's Box Rap

With the first ten games in the books and all
The Blue Jays are playing .300 ball
And because they're having such an awful time
Today's introduction will be written in rhyme.

Another ugly loss as the Jays lose 11-2 to the Orioles.

We're going to the Dome, and there is still one free ticket left. For a classic pitching matchup, no less.

And laughed at all the shoppers
And security guards trailed us
To a record shop
We asked for Mojo Nixon
They said "He don't work here"
We said "If you don't got Mojo Nixon
Then your store could use some fixin'"

I don't know where the rest of the Bauxite staffers went, so I guess I'll start the thread. Bonus points for identifying why this title was chosen.

I know I'm in the minority, but I love the Jays new home whites. They've got to do something about those caps, though.

It's been a while since we've run a "Hijack central" thread, and it's going to continue to be the case, because in accordance with new FCC mandates, I've re-named it "Weekend Open Forum." While "The Thread Formerly Known As Hijack Central" was my first choice, the new title is much less violent. True, the FCC would rather me call this "Sunshine, Lollipops, and Rainbows: Everything is Super," or "Your Mom Always Said That If You Didn't Have Anything Nice To Say, Don't Say It." But I have my limits.

I'll kick things off with this statistic: the Expos have scored 10 runs in nine games. Say that again. TEN RUNS IN NINE GAMES. For all of Bud Selig's evil machinations (as opposed to all those benevolent machinations), I don't know if we can blame Selig for this one. What the hell, let's blame him anyway.

Last year it was the Minnesota Twins who played all their games against the Jays in April.

Jason Johnson threw six shutout innings for the win on opening day in Skydome, but was roughed up in his next start by the Twins. Roy Halladay has April gopheritis again (5 homeruns allowed in 2 starts), but I don't read much into that. I expect Doc to shut down the Tigers as long as the interior defence plays well.

Question of the Day: Will Kevin Cash get the day off after a night game?

Once again there is no TV coverage for this game.

On September 27th, 2003, Will Carroll visited with about 50 or so of us a diehard seamheads. We had pizza, we had beverages, we saw Roy Halladay win his 22nd game, and everyone other than Jody Gerut and Brandon Phillips had a terrific time.

Now Mr. Carroll is coming back to Toronto!

It drives you crazy, sends you screaming for the door
Work there for a year or two and you can't get to like it
I don't work in supermarkets anymore

As an addendum to today's Ode to Kevin Cash, it's time to pay up on another installment of Baseball's Hall of Names. This time, let's determine the best team Money ... er, Cash ... er, a plugged Nickle ... well, you get the idea ... can buy.

Fed on nothing but full of pride
Look at them go, look at them kick
Makes you wonder how the other half live