Remember the old joke about the New Orleans Saints fan who was so disgusted with his team's play that he left two tickets on the dashboard of his car, hoping they'd be stolen? He returned an hour later to find his windshield smashed and four more Saints tickets lying there.

Well, it was a smashed-windshield sort of game yesterday afternoon in Tampa. If there was one game to miss this year, this was it.

In honor of Shea Hillenbrand, 29 random observations from watching last night's ballgame...

These aren't the same Blue Jays of Opening Days past. Remember last year, when Jason Johnson -- Jason Johnson! -- outpitched Roy Halladay?

Or the Derek Jeter Affair in 2003? These were sad, sad days in the Greater Toronto Area, my loyal and loving readers. Oh, not Jeter getting hurt, the loss. The loss was sad.

Most of this spring training I've been saying that Spring Training results and statistics are virtually meaningless. However, even the biggest cynic has to be impressed with a 16-10 record, the best in the American League, during these exhibition gamess. There would no doubt be a lot of carping if the Jays went 10-16, so let's take a moment to enjoy their fine record.

The last week of spring training is always like this - everybody can't wait for it to end and get on with the real stuff. Pitchers and catchers reported six weeks ago. They are ready, ready, ready.

And so are we, by the way.

The Phillies and Blue Jays played to a 9-9 tie yesterday, and will spend the remainder of the pre-season working on extra point conversions. But, the real news was the final roster changes, the subject of much discussion here at the Box.

One year ago, Blue Jays fans were coming off a season filled with highs, looking forward to the imminent return of the 2003 Cy Young award winner and the 2003 MVP runner-up at first base.

Well, we all know how that turned out.

So, I didn't get to hear the game, and I got to see about thirty seconds of one-camera highlights on Sportsnet News last night. Not a lot to base a game report on.

And that's why I'm cheaping out!

What a crappy game. Was there anything noteworthy about it?

I can't think of anything. I thought about it for hours and I couldn't come up with anything to say about yesterday's game. This should be a fun Game Report, then.

Is 4-zip a good enough beating NFH ?

Excellent game for the good guys yesterday, Walker, League, Glynn, Downs and Whiteside combined for a one-hit shutout of Detroit and the Jays won their 14th game of the Spring.

Not much to report from yesterday's game. At least not much good. Well, Batista and Chulk didn't give up any runs. Alex Rios got two hits, one of them double in 4 at-bats. I'd tell you more, but...

Roy Halladay looked sharp. Schoeneweis, Ligtenberg, Speier, and Frasor were near-perfect. Frankie the Cat didn't just drive in 5 runs. He had a couple of hits against a left-hander. The Jays beat the NL East champs, they look just great, they're going all the way, man. All the way! YEAHH!!

It's spring time, we're allowed to dream. In fact, we should be dreaming.

You see, the spring will be over soon. We will be bumping our heads against Reality. Not tomorrow, but soon, and for the rest of the year. It might hurt. Let us dream while we still can...

Before I get to what I want to talk about, I'm going to give you a brief history of the NFH - Blue Jays love affair. It's necessary to explain why I feel the way I do about things. Don't worry, it doesn't get too goopy and nobody dies from a bee sting.

This is the third consecutive shutout (albeit in a rain-shortened 6 ½ innings) I’ve covered in my Game Reports. Spring training shutouts are not the most exciting things in the world to write about, I can tell you.

Yarrr, the Jays won in the bottom of the ninth yesterday. Sparky with a fake bunt single and Huckaby chugging around third. Yo ho ho! Okay, enough dumb pirate jokes.

Today's Game Report is going to be a little different. I don't think anyone has ever done this before.