Batter's Box Interactive Magazine Batter's Box Interactive Magazine Batter's Box Interactive Magazine
We left Fredericton, NB at 4 a.m. Atlantic Standard Time on Monday morning, in a haze of sleep deprivation. Were it not for the discovery of a wonderful beverage called Red Bull, we most certainly would not have made it to our destination: Boston, MA. The group was comprised of four classmates and friends - one from New Brunswick, one from Ontario, one from Quebec and one from Newfoundland - the goal of which was to take in a couple of marquee sporting events.

After seven hours of driving and one ungodly $200.00 US speeding ticket courtesy of a Maine State Trooper, we arrived in Boston just in time to discover that it was Patriot's Day, which meant the Boston Marathon would begin at roughly the same time as Monday morning's Red Sox vs. Yankees game. We had planned on going to Fenway and taking in the game, the former of which was accomplished before the dreams of the latter were dashed by multiple instances of attempted extorsion by Yawkey Way's "unautorized ticket vendors". As it turned out, we were able to catch the game at a nearby sports bar where we were free to drink all of the watered-down draught beer that the baseball ticket portion of our collective budget could afford.

Luckily, we had purchased our tickets for game seven of the Bruins vs. Canadiens playoff series via the internet, and at face value. We arrived at the game in full Canadiens regalia, not necessarily understanding the implications of doing so. The heckling to which we were subjected before the game, while profanity-laced, seemed harmless and good-natured.

As you likely know, the Canadiens would beat the Bruins by a count of 2 - 0. As the animosity grew amongst the sea of black and gold clad fans, I was secretly wishing that Joe Thornton would tally a couple of goals in order to turn the disdain for the Canadiens (and the Canadians) into some sort of pity - after all, we had opted not to take out one day health coverage.

The post-game anger toward us, before we exited the Fleet Center, was comprised mostly of insults regarding the Canadiens themselves. "Habs Suck" seemed to be a popular refrain, which was tolerable because it was so impersonal and lacked the violent overtones of the subsequent heckles. As we drew closer to the exit of the rink, nationalism reared its ugly head. Among my favourites was "go back to Canada" - which was, of course, our plan. We thought it best not to thank the kind people for wishing us well on our trip home. Then it was - and I am not kidding - "you'd be speaking German if it wasn't for us." Wrong on so many levels that it is best not to even bother dissecting it. As a unilingual anglophone, I would be ecstatic if I were suddenly able to speak German, but again, I felt it prudent not to retort. Then came the favourite tactic of Boston fans: questioning the sexual orientation of the opposing team's fans and players. As it turns out, we Canadians have somehow managed to propogate our country via procreation over 150+ years despite all being "wicked queer".

This is in no way an indictment of Boston or its citizens. In fact, we love the city and are already planning our next trip - we'll just dress in non-team specific clothes next time.

After ditching our Canadiens clothing, we went to a small bar near the Fleet Center to watch the Bruins fans drink away their sorrows and catch the Canucks vs. Flames game. Sox sinker-ball artist Derek Lowe made an unexpected appearance at the bar, allowing us to marvel at the submissiveness with which each lady in the place presented herself to him. He left after roughly an hour, and then we did the same.

We awoke on Tuesday morning and decided to visit Quincy Market, which was spectacular. Our last stop before heading home was Cambridge, MA, ostensibly because one of us wanted to (how shall I put this tactfully?) "use the men's room" at Harvard Law School. As Canadian law students, it is fair to say that Harvard does not give a s*** about us, but we were mature enough to reciprocate nevertheless.

And that was the trip. It was fun. Many thanks to the other members of our motley quartet: Pascal Comeau, Wes Newton, and Clarence Bennett.
A Trip to Beantown | 12 comments | Create New Account
The following comments are owned by whomever posted them. This site is not responsible for what they say.
Gerry - Thursday, April 22 2004 @ 01:50 PM EDT (#71212) #
Well done - very funny. I liked this line from the Red Bull FAQ..

"Most ingredients are produced by pharmaceutical companies. This guarantees highest quality."

as opposed to those nasty drinks from natural ingredients. I like my chemicals to be top quality.
_Tom - Thursday, April 22 2004 @ 02:06 PM EDT (#71213) #
http://mothershipconnection.blogspot.com/
$200 speeding ticket? What, were you doing 145mph? Or do Maine troopers hate Canadians as much as us Bostonians do? ;)

Next time you guys come "up" my way, give me a heads-up, I can hip you to the bars that don't serve "watered-down" drafts.
_Harry Heatherin - Thursday, April 22 2004 @ 02:07 PM EDT (#71214) #
Inquring minds want to know: did Lowe exit that bar alone, or did he choose a flooze?
_Clarence - Thursday, April 22 2004 @ 02:12 PM EDT (#71215) #
Good recap Leigh, except you forgot to mention the submissiveness with which each lady in the bar presented herself to you. Also noteworthy was the fact that Nomar watched the Bruins game with us, was flashed on the scoreboard, and managed to garner the largest cheer of the night. Goes to show how little the Bruins fan had to cheer for...
Craig B - Thursday, April 22 2004 @ 02:14 PM EDT (#71216) #
ostensibly because one of us wanted to (how shall I put this tactfully?) "use the men's room" at Harvard Law School

Remind me, Leigh, to tell you the story of how I came to urinate on both the Supreme Court of Canada *and* the Supreme Court of the United States. One day when we have beer and a half hour to kill.

On my next trip to London, I tempted to visit Westminster and attempt a trifecta by urinating on the Judicial Office of the House of Lords, but I think that with the world's newfound obsession with security this might be more difficult to accomplish.
_Moffatt - Thursday, April 22 2004 @ 02:32 PM EDT (#71217) #
Burley's pick up truck has a decal of Calvin peeing on former Canadian Supreme Court Justice Antonio Lamer. It's true!
_Jobu - Thursday, April 22 2004 @ 03:11 PM EDT (#71218) #
Anyone got any entertaining stories of wearing jay's gear to fenway? Im tempted to do that this year or next, want to know if i should wear my jersey or fashionable kevlar.
_Tom - Thursday, April 22 2004 @ 03:21 PM EDT (#71219) #
http://mothershipconnection.blogspot.com/
Jobu,

Don't worry about the Jays regalia, just as long as it doesn't have pinstripes and the letters NY on it. We're usually partial to the teams in the same boat as us (i.e. behind the Yankees in the standings.) Do, however look for some creative harassment from our band of drunken yokels.

Stuff like calling you guys the Toronto Bay Devil Jays because of the new unis and offensive struggles.

Asking things like if there's an exchange rate and exorbitant fee on runs and if that's the reason you don't score any in America.

The typical "You guys have a baseball team in Toronto?" joke, never gets old.

Aside from that, anybody who says things along the lines of sexual preferences and/or nationalistic crap, ignore them. Us intelligent fans usually tell them to shut ut with a flying plastic cup to the head.
_MatO - Thursday, April 22 2004 @ 03:29 PM EDT (#71220) #
As it turns out, we Canadians have somehow managed to propogate our country via procreation over 150+ years despite all being "wicked queer".

Of course not all Canadians are "wicked queer" only Canadiens fans. Not that there is anything wrong with that. :-)

Go Leafs.
_Jobu - Thursday, April 22 2004 @ 03:32 PM EDT (#71221) #
Thanks for the info Tom, its fairly encouraging for my future dream trip. The "baseball team in T.O." line is faily easily countered with "yeah... we won a couple of championships 10 years ago, how are you guys doing?" :)

Do you live in Boston and like the jays for some reason or just visit fenway alot from wherever you are?
Craig B - Thursday, April 22 2004 @ 03:55 PM EDT (#71222) #
calling you guys the Toronto Bay Devil Jays because of the new unis and offensive struggles

Now THAT'S funny. Whoever came up with that one, gets one point.
_Tom - Thursday, April 22 2004 @ 04:52 PM EDT (#71223) #
http://mothershipconnection.blogspot.com/
Now THAT'S funny. Whoever came up with that one, gets one point.

Awesome, can I redeem said point for Batter's Box gear? I yelled this out in a bar one night and everybody took a shining to it, won me a free beer.

Do you live in Boston and like the jays for some reason or just visit fenway alot from wherever you are?

Actually, I'm a Bostonian, typical die-hard Sox fan, but for some reason like this site (think it was the music references that won me over.) But now that I visit this site so frenquently, I have come to like the Jays more and more, and I try to catch as many games on TV as I can. Plus Delgado is one of my more favorite players.

Thanks for the info Tom, its fairly encouraging for my future dream trip. The "baseball team in T.O." line is faily easily countered with "yeah... we won a couple of championships 10 years ago, how are you guys doing?" :)

And we'd just counter, "We're in first, how about you guys?" heh heh.
A Trip to Beantown | 12 comments | Create New Account
The following comments are owned by whomever posted them. This site is not responsible for what they say.