Okay, so I had something ready to post today, a nice little non-Jays-related puff piece -- I rarely write anything "in-depth" that requires "research" or "hard work" -- only to find that today also marked the posting of the two most engaging articles in BB's brief history: JMG's cruel march through spring training and Gideon's management seminar.
So I punted my puff piece until later, but still wanted to add some postmodern theory to the ranking of Ye Olde Toronto Managers Guild. And regular readers of this blog may recall that I believe everything about a person is contained in their "personal anagram." So without further ado (and before we bid adieu), read on for evidence of Jimy Williams' self-deprecation, Buck Martinez' overreliance on Jose Jr. and a truly prescient give-peace-a-chance statement by Tim Johnson.
If you don't know how personal anagrams work, or what an anagram is, well, I'm lazy so go read about it yourself in I, Rearrangement Servant (which, to the trained eye, is obviously an anagram for "Internet Anagram Server").
The rules for a personal anagram are simple: start with the letters in your full name as you use it every day and rearrange them to reveal your true personality. If nothing works very well, cheat. Add in your middle name, use your full first name, add your middle initial or full middle name ... any combination until you find something you like. Er, until the Great Truth is Revealed. Add punctuation wherever it is needed. For instance, I ("Michael Doherty") anagramatically, convert to "Hey! I'm a Tech Lord!"
Now, to the ranking of our Jays managers based on how cool their personal anagrams are.
1. Timothy Evan Johnson
Shh ... Not Vietnam? No joy!
Comments: Really, do we need comments here?
2. Buck Martinez
Cruz? Bank time!
Comments: Maybe if Little Jose had lived up to the hype, Buck would still be in the dugout.
3. Jimy Williams
I'm ... I'm Jay swill.
Comments: Bonus points for being the only manager in team history with the letters "Jay" to work with in the anagram. But a little self-defeating and negative, don't you think?
4. Bobby Cox
Boxy Cobb
Comments: The easiest anagram in the bunch. Perhaps it refers to the man's build when compared to former Tiger great Ty Cobb? Bobby was certainly a better manager than Tyrus.
5. Roy T. Hartsfield
Fry that "soldier"!
Comments: Roy apparently still bitter about the damage Tim Johnson did to the reputation of Jays managers throughout history.
6T. Cito Gaston
So, it can't go?
6T. Jim Fregosi
Jog; misfire.
6T. Bobby Mattick
Tick by a bomb.
Comments: I have no earthly idea, but these seem meaningful. Uh, don't they?
https://www.battersbox.ca/article.php?story=20030307013247999