Write your own headlines; Toronto stories to start with. You'll get the idea. Jump in! one rule: no nicknames, those are too easy. Proper names -- first or last -- only.

In a game where David has a great start but Ligtenberg blows the save:
KERRY BLOWS LEAD FOR BUSH

But in the next game, Ligtenberg gets a win while his batterymate hits a walkoff homer:
CASH AND KERRY: JAYS WIN

In a game where Vinnie is tossed by the ump for "emery"-ing the baseball:
UMP ERASES CHULK BOARD

An obvious one where Vernon get the extra-inning game-winning hit against San Diego in interleague play off a former Jay lefty:
ALL'S WELLS THAT ENDS WELLS

Johnson's big offensive day earns a win for Bob:
BIG JAYS AT THE OFFICE: REED IT, THEN FILE IT

Feature about the future of a potential closer:
JAYS RELIEVER A-SPEIERS TO GREATER THINGS

Challenge: don't resort to the obvious Gross, Lilly and Towers puns; find a new twist!

And around the majors ...

Obvious Reds headline (Reds-line?)
CASEY AT THE BAT, GRAVES CONCERN ON THE MOUND

For the Florida speedster:
OUI, OUI: PIERRE RUNS WILD

Milwuaukee wins at San Francisco thanks to a mammoth homer from the 1B:
LYLE HITS ONE OVERBAY, JINTS LOSE TO BREW CREW

St. Louis keeps winning thank to MVP candidate, former Jay;
CARPENTER NAILS IT DOWN, CARDS KEEP ROLEN, ROLEN, ROLEN

Of course,now that we've opened it up to the entire MLB universe, the possibilities are endless!

GIANTS PUT STOCK IN BONDS
MINNY NON-ROOK FORD HAS A BETTER IDEA
PADS SHORTSTOP: IT AIN'T EASY BEIN' GREENE
DODGERS KNOW BENCH STRENGTH WERTH A LOT IN PENNANT RACE

Fire away ... and remember, don't just go for the EZ-Pun (tm). Make sure it's a real, viable baseball headline, either for a game story or a feature.

Best headline (winner to be chosen by a committee of me, with assistance from The Cabal) prize TBD. No frequent cuttlefish points can be redeemed as part of this contest.