According to one of Batter's Box's various Ryans earlier today, "It took [the Blue jays] until 2002 to finally have a Smith and there still hasn't been a Jones in the team's history." I can't resist a challenge (such as the one subsequently issued by Mike Green, so here goes with the All-Jones team proposed in today's main thread.
A few notes ... exactly 90 players named Jones have appeared in a big league uniform. And exactly one of those players, William Timothy Jones, caught one inning of one game for the Cardinals in 1989; and as far as I can tell, no other Jones has ever appeared behind the plate in a big league uniform.
So we're not exactly starting with a bedrock foundation; even the aforementioend W. Timothy's versatility -- primarily an infielder, he appeared in at least one game at every position, including pitcher -- goes to waste, since nobody else can catch. But we might have the greatest defensive outfield of all time.
And if you're wondering why he's referred to as "W. Timothy," well, as far as Joneses are concerned, there have been two Tims -- and two Sams, two Ricks, two Mikes, two Jeffs, a Jake and a Jacque as well as two Jacks, two Jimmys, two Henrys, two Chrises, two Charlies and a Charley, two Bobs AND two Bobbys and two Bills. There are also three 19th century playes just listed as "Jones," who combined for nine hits in 32 AB total in their respective cumulative "careers."
And you want names? The Joneses have also produced two Deacons, Stacy, Tracy, Jim (did he drink the Kool-Aid?), Tom (okay, as names go, "it's not unusual") Bumpus, Broadway, Cowboy, Binky and Nippy. I am not making any of this up.
So here's a whack at the All-Jones lineup ..
* indicates former All-Star selection
Front Office (crossover owner): Jerry Jones (Dallas Cowboys)
MGR Fielder Jones (Only Jones to manage; 683-582 career and '06 WS champs)
STARTING LINEUP
C W. Timothy Jones
1B Mack Jones (133 career homers)
2B Dalton Jones (Red Sox all-time leader in PH)
SS Jack "Angel Sleeves" Jones (best of weak bunch gets nod for cool nickname)
3B Willie "Puddin' Head" Jones*
RF Cleon Jones*
CF Andruw Jones*
LF Ruppert Jones*
DH Chipper Jones*
BENCH
C Vacant
IF Bob W. Jones (played every position but P, C)
IF Cobe Jones (ironically, Cobe was from Colorado)
OF Jacques Jones
OF Davy Jones (14 seasons, .270, 200+SB plus he had that gig with the Monkees)
Believe me, no other position players deserve to be on this team. As for the pitching staff ...
LHSP Randy Jones* (42 wins for '75-'76 Padres; started '76 All-Star Game)
RHSP Bobby J. Jones* (89-83)
LHSP Percy Jones (53-57)
RHSP Sheldon "Available" Jones (54-57, plus the great nickname))
RHSP Toothpick Sam Jones* (not Sad Sam)
CL Doug Jones*
SET Todd Jones*
RHRP Barry Jones (33-33, 23 saves)
LHRP Bobby M. Jones (got a ring with Sox last year)
RH SWING Jimmy Jones (43-39)
LH SWING Mike C. Jones (11-10 in 25 starts, 36 relief outings)
Come on, folks, this team is positively ... jonesing ... for improvements. Whatcha got?
A few notes ... exactly 90 players named Jones have appeared in a big league uniform. And exactly one of those players, William Timothy Jones, caught one inning of one game for the Cardinals in 1989; and as far as I can tell, no other Jones has ever appeared behind the plate in a big league uniform.
So we're not exactly starting with a bedrock foundation; even the aforementioend W. Timothy's versatility -- primarily an infielder, he appeared in at least one game at every position, including pitcher -- goes to waste, since nobody else can catch. But we might have the greatest defensive outfield of all time.
And if you're wondering why he's referred to as "W. Timothy," well, as far as Joneses are concerned, there have been two Tims -- and two Sams, two Ricks, two Mikes, two Jeffs, a Jake and a Jacque as well as two Jacks, two Jimmys, two Henrys, two Chrises, two Charlies and a Charley, two Bobs AND two Bobbys and two Bills. There are also three 19th century playes just listed as "Jones," who combined for nine hits in 32 AB total in their respective cumulative "careers."
And you want names? The Joneses have also produced two Deacons, Stacy, Tracy, Jim (did he drink the Kool-Aid?), Tom (okay, as names go, "it's not unusual") Bumpus, Broadway, Cowboy, Binky and Nippy. I am not making any of this up.
So here's a whack at the All-Jones lineup ..
* indicates former All-Star selection
Front Office (crossover owner): Jerry Jones (Dallas Cowboys)
MGR Fielder Jones (Only Jones to manage; 683-582 career and '06 WS champs)
STARTING LINEUP
C W. Timothy Jones
1B Mack Jones (133 career homers)
2B Dalton Jones (Red Sox all-time leader in PH)
SS Jack "Angel Sleeves" Jones (best of weak bunch gets nod for cool nickname)
3B Willie "Puddin' Head" Jones*
RF Cleon Jones*
CF Andruw Jones*
LF Ruppert Jones*
DH Chipper Jones*
BENCH
C Vacant
IF Bob W. Jones (played every position but P, C)
IF Cobe Jones (ironically, Cobe was from Colorado)
OF Jacques Jones
OF Davy Jones (14 seasons, .270, 200+SB plus he had that gig with the Monkees)
Believe me, no other position players deserve to be on this team. As for the pitching staff ...
LHSP Randy Jones* (42 wins for '75-'76 Padres; started '76 All-Star Game)
RHSP Bobby J. Jones* (89-83)
LHSP Percy Jones (53-57)
RHSP Sheldon "Available" Jones (54-57, plus the great nickname))
RHSP Toothpick Sam Jones* (not Sad Sam)
CL Doug Jones*
SET Todd Jones*
RHRP Barry Jones (33-33, 23 saves)
LHRP Bobby M. Jones (got a ring with Sox last year)
RH SWING Jimmy Jones (43-39)
LH SWING Mike C. Jones (11-10 in 25 starts, 36 relief outings)
Come on, folks, this team is positively ... jonesing ... for improvements. Whatcha got?
